So one of my favourite people ever, the smart and beautiful Ms Brenda Lye, has started a travel blog! It would be great if you could go show her some love. Go like her posts, reblog and follow.
Much love 🙂 ,
It’s the bimonthly Meet and Greet everyone!! Strap on your party shoes and join the fun!
Ok so here are the rules:
- Leave a link to your page or post in the comments of this post.
- Reblog this post. It helps you, it helps me, it helps everyone!
- Edit your reblog post and add tags.
Feel free to leave your link multiple times! It is okay to update your link for more exposure every day if you want. It is up to you!
- Share this post on social media. Many of my non-blogger friends love that I put the Meet n Greet on Facebook and Twitter because they find new blogs to follow.
See ya on Monday!!
I don’t blame you for being tired.
You’ll never admit it but i can tell.
It drips from your words like an ominous drizzle.
It leaks from your eyes like the tears I’m not supposed to know about.
My brand of crazy burns the throat and coerces the tears.
It has claimed victims most determined.
It makes lightweights of champions
And it cripples with brutal callousness.
I don’t blame you for stepping back
When you were lacerated by my shrapnel.
I couldn’t bear to see the pain
That my monstrous volatility did cause you.
I don’t blame you for turning away.
For life has thrown you enough curve-balls,
And your feet singe from the fires you had to walk through,
And your heart too has ached on lonesome nights.
So I won’t blame you for leaving me.
You deserve to feel the healing breeze,
The perfect respite, the sudden ease,
That comes when you walk away from my toxic storm.
Thoughts of you bleed free
On solemn nights like these.
Memories of who I used to be
Before you left me begging on my knees.
One minute we were flames
Dancing together, burning passion.
Suddenly everything changed, you were playing games.
Our love turned to fiction.
I try to think of my mistake.
Tear the earth in two there is no answer.
I try in vain to numb the ache.
Freefalling endlessly without an anchor.
I looked over my shoulder as I walked away
Hoping that you’d look back as well.
All you left me was dismay
As you left without farewell.
This is no place for the souls of men
But linger still do many.
They choose the charcoal oblivion.
Pariahs coming together yet still alone.
For here exists only the self, self upon self
Among the steady chime of silence.
A soft hum but also a deafening roar
Mellifluous, everlasting companion to one, to all.
Dwelling ground for the broken and the hopeless
Dissuaded by the world’s nefarious nature.
They weep with tears they do not have
For a world that is no longer theirs.
So I know that I’ve been gone for the longest time. Heck, my last post was all the way back in January! That’s like 6 months without a single post. This does bother me immensely but there is reason hidden behind my silence. I’ve had an immensely tough year and usually, I use writing as a catharsis to help me move on from things but this time I just couldn’t. Every time I picked up a pen or opened a document I felt the voices in my head like a screaming, bitter orchestra. Every time I tried to write they chided me and told me it was all stupid and horrible. It was a crisis of faith in myself and my abilities and going to university and getting to interact with people of such incredible talent drove me further away from writing.
I experienced a lot of trauma over the year as well, some of which i didn’t dare even tell my closest of friends about. Everything I went through took a real toll on me and I reached my breaking point at the start of the summer. Because of these two things, I thought it would be better to try to focus on myself first and try to work my way back to a relatively healthy state. I’m glad to say that I finally broke free of my writer’s curse and am starting to write again. In fact, I have some new stuff coming up very soon and am going to be trying to work on a posting schedule to keep things more regular.
However, I’m still far from being in that healthy state that I have been trying to reach and somewhere in the middle of the summer, my situation deteriorated a little more after making some progress. But hopefully I’ll make it through ok and I’ve just gotta keep trying. All I know is that writing is so very important to me and I’ve always received encouragement for it so I’m going to fight hard to keep my spark alive. And finally, for those who still follow me and read my work, thanks for being so very patient with me.